The New Year

We are 14 days into the new year, and I did not have a new years resolution to start out 2014.  I did not want to rewrite the same ole resolutions that have been my resolutions since I can remember.  Instead, I let God speak to me and this is what I got; Jeremiah 29:11 "For I know the plans I have for you," declares the Lord, "plans to prosper you and not to harm you, plans to give you hope and a future."  A week before the new year, I began questioning my purpose in life.  Along with those questions came answers of inadequacy, failure and worthlessness.  I began to wonder why God  has given me the life that I live.  What purpose am I serving by cooking, cleaning, running errands and all that stay at home moms do.  Then this past Sunday, God spoke to me.  My purpose in life, whether I am a stay at home mom or a big shot corporate woman, is to love God and to love others.  So my resolution this year is to commit to the things that have been on my new years resolution for many years...that is to love God above all else, and be a healthy version of myself.  To finally put an end to feeling bad about myself, and to start loving myself.  As a dear friend puts it...this year is to RECLAIM!!

The first objective to reclaiming back my life is to have accountability, and what better way than to blog and commit to blogging every single day for the next year.  On top of participating in bible studies, I am committing to reading a devotional from Jesus Calling, and blogging about the day's devotional and how God is speaking to me through that devotional.  I will also jot down my weight loss progress.  I did start reading a devotional out of Jesus Calling yesterday, but did not blog about it, so I will start from yesterday's devotional.

Jan. 13
This day's devotional was about living each day like an adventure.  Don't predict what's going to happen, or try to manipulate the day to go your way.  To be attentive to Him, and to all that He has prepared for you.  Resist the tendency to take the easiest route.
Psalm 118: 24; 1 Peter 2:21

This is so me.  I try to plan each day accordingly.  The less stress, the better.  But some days will throw you a curve ball, and you can't stress out about it.  Just let God take you where He wants you to go.  Just keep Him in the forefront of  your mind, and no matter how chaotic, He will take you through it.  He also reminds me to make best of what God has blessed me with.  God has blessed me with the opportunity to stay home with my children.  I need to make the best of it because one day they will be grown, and I will miss these times.  And to make good use of my time.  To be more involved at Church, and to just do God's work.

Jan. 14
Today's devotional really spoke to me.  It was about not feeling ashamed about being empty.  That emptiness is a blessing because that is an optimal condition to be filled by His grace and peace.  It is easy to touch up your outward appearance, thinking you can fool people, but you cannot fool God.  He can see the depths of your being.  Talk with Him about your struggles or feelings of inadequacy, and He will turn your weaknesses into strength.
1 Samuel 16:7; Romans 8:38-39

As a stay at home mom, inadequacy is a feeling I feel frequently.  Not being able to financially contribute to the household damages my self-worth.  But God reminds me that self-worth is not about how much you are worth, in monetary value, but what you are worth in Christ.  To know that God does not make mistakes.  We are where He wants us to be.  I can and should openly talk to Him about my struggles of feeling inadequate, and let Him work in me.

Now to other news, the past two days have been successful.  I have been counting my calories and exercising.  So needless to say, my back hurts and I need to lay down, so this is all for now!